Surviving Survivalist Blogs

There are a lot of people preparing for the apocalypse. Seems one of the most popular blog types floating through the web sewers these days is the survival blog. There are more wilderness survival blogs than there are bears shitting in the woods. City slickers have urban survival blogs. The impending economic collapse even has its own survival blogs from people pimping gold and silver. Survivalists have even carved out a niche called "preppers"...those that are preparing for the impending doom.

I'm not sure what the fuck many of these people are doing quite frankly. It's like they've watched too many re-runs of "I Am Legend" or view "The Walking Dead" as a documentary.

I am all about being prepared. We hoard food. We can food. We grow food. We stash water. Collect plenty of bullets. But it's not because I expect "Eli" to walk by with the Book.

I prepare for the possibility of supply disruptions. For civil chaos closing stores for a few days. For a natural or man-made disaster that makes getting supplies difficult for a few weeks. I do not want to have to go stand in line with the herd when I can simply consume from my own supplies. I do not want to have to rely on the government for my needs. FEMA? Please, fucker.

A few years ago I witnessed what supply disruptions can do to people. For some reason gasoline supplies were low in Middle TN, particularly Nashville. People were desperate to get their cars filled up. Lines were hours long. Gas stations were out of fuel. People would literally follow tankers around. It lasted a week or so and sucked it you needed gas. Now, I won't be hoarding gasoline any time soon as I can survive without it. But what if something similar happened with food or water? I've seen a microcosm of what happens to the herd when they get desperate. It wasn't pretty. What do you think these fuckers are going to do when they are hungry?

I prepare for two main scenarios: 1) An electrical grid shutdown from the effects of an electro-magnetic pulse from the sun or from terrorism or 2) Losing my job.

Either way I want to ensure that I have enough cash, food, water, and bullets to outlast any problems that this may cause.

If I lose my job then I want to spend  as much time replacing the income lost without worrying if I can feed my family. Instead of spending hundreds on food I can use that money to pay the mortgage or keep the lights on.

The EMP outage could be devastating. Most people I know carry little cash these days preferring to use a charge card. How are you going to exchange for goods when the bank is closed? The most paranoid think they are going to tool around and have to use gold coins for trade. Whatever. Most shitheads wouldn't know a Gold Panda from a bottle top.

I've seen survival gear lists that would blow your mind. Bug out bags. Tactical gear. Survival kits. Is this survival? This is just consumption. More shit to store.

Look, if your life has the potential of ending because of earthquakes or fires or hurricanes then you would be crazy not to have a preparedness list of gear you need to bug out with. But a wire saw? Only if you intend on sawing through your hotel door I guess.

If you are going into the woods then you need a wilderness survival pack. Absolutely. If you live in the north where snowdrifts are buildings then you need winter survival gear in your car. Of course if you live in the south where snow might touch the ground for more than an hour then you need to plan on the apocalypse complete with 90 days worth of cigarettes, Pabst Blue Ribbon and moon pies. Ever seen a grocery store after the herd grazes through before an impending snow flake? Not pretty.

I own two of the Bear Grylls Survival Kits. We keep them in the car. Mostly it's because they are really cool. I suspect that I will never need them. Then again my daughter swears there will be zombies. She even has a zombie survival guide. No shit.

Survival is a funny thing. Most people prepare like they are going to be home watching Factor X Dancing Idol when the fan hits the shit. Rather I suspect the herd will be slaving away in the cubicles or across town buying yarn or taking the spawn to a shitty movie. That's why minimalist survival is what I'm more interested in.

Stay tuned...

Americans Gave Up Their Essential Liberty Ten Years Ago

They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. -Benjamin Franklin

Today America marks the 10-year anniversary of the Islamic attack on our country on 9/11. It was an insidious act of terrorism and cowardice from our enemies in the Middle East. It has forever changed this county in the most despicable ways imaginable. That one terrorist act has brought down the most free and wealthy country the world has ever known. Despite the disgusting and wasteful wars in Iraq and Afghanistan I do not think for a minute this country has won a motherfucking thing.

Our government has turned a war against Islamic terrorists into a war on their own citizens. 9/11 will forever be marked as the singular event that undermined the freedoms and liberties Americans had always enjoyed. In the name of "patriotism" these ideals have been destroyed. Fuck the Patriot Act nine ways to Sunday.

We are now strip searched without warrant at our airports. Our finances are now meticulously scrutinized by the feds...Want to pay someone $10K? Oops there goes a red flag. We have no idea what the National Security Agency is doing daily via the phone system and Internet. You can damn sure bet every single message or phone call is screened for anything that they deem unreasonable. Have a look around at your communities and tell me what the hell is going on with the militaristic jackboot law enforcement.

Sure we may have gone to the Middle East and slung our missiles over the desert and let our SpecOps folks kill the bad guys, but how exactly has that benefited you? Keeping the terrorist horde over there? Great but it cost us $1.2 Trillion and counting. We are dead broke. $14 trillion in the hole...and counting. Wasn't there a way to safeguard the U.S. without getting in two wars and spending this country into oblivion as well as not reverting to an Orwellian nightmare?

Islamists hate our freedom and liberties. So what did we do after 9/11? We gave them up. Just like they had hoped. Osama achieved everything that he had hoped he would. We let that bastard win by doing exactly what he wanted us to.

Following the attacks Bush over-reached in the powers he desired and took away Americans freedoms. Americans succumbed to false patriotism and unknowingly allowed our leaders to take down the country.

So Benjamin Franklin was right, we deserve neither liberty or freedom. We gave it up for temporary safety. Now we are paying for it with a government that dismisses the Constitution daily. A government that gets bigger and stronger each day. A government that neither fears or responds to the will of the people.

We are all endowed with the unalienable right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, and that the only function of government was to insure those rights. Apparently we were happy enough to give that up and live under government rule.

We lost fuckers.

A Celebration of Labor Day With Lazy Jackwagons

North America celebrates fuckers working today. The U.S. has its Labor Day and the Canadians enjoy their Labour Day. I don't know shit about Canada and how it's doing economically. I know I buy quite a few resource stocks with their HQ in the perma frost so I hope they keep working their asses off.

The U.S. has its own problems. Last month this country of 300 million people added no new jobs. None. Not a fucking one. To celebrate Labor Day is to get on your fucking knees and be thankful you have a job and pray you get to keep it. Our government is doing everything in its power to ensure the country continues its recession. The current administration may have inherited a sewage tank full of economic shit but, but motherfuckers, they are not competent enough to solve the problem. It's like having someone clean up a fucking frat party by covering it with horse shit. These Chicago government gangsters are idiots.

I began my work celebration early yesterday by spending 4 precious afternoon hours building 8 Squidoo lenses. Waste of time? Maybe. Maybe not. Each month my income from those increase nicely. How? I dunno. I do nothing with or for them but I get paid more each month.

In these perilous days I find that to be important because I feel the need to increase my money supply when I can and while I can. I plan on working in the cubicle slavatoriums as long as I can. It's easy money and they pay for needed benefits and such. Collecting coin from online ventures is part of the economic ritual I endure as well. I survive as a wage slave. I thrive as a web sewer magician.

Of course America is the new Greece. I've read stories where scumbags will apply for work and ask that they be employed in 2-3 months. Seems these lazy jackwagons prefer the easy comfort of having the government, ME motherfucker!, pay for their lounging activities in their over-mortgaged abode while they eat gravy sticks bought with their weekly supply of food stamps and spend their 50th week of unemployment bennies on hand lotion and PBR.

But this is not typical. Americans are badass. If the government at all levels get the fuck out of the way we will work our asses off. We will invent and innovate. This country knows how to create wealth. It's why the rest of the world fucking hates us. We are free, or used to be, to create businesses that are the envy of the world. Now our leaders apologize for our success and are doing everything in their power to control our ability to be great. For whatever reason they see European Socialism as some kind of  wonderful ideology. Fucking Europe. It's worked out so well over there. We know exactly what has worked well. Republic government with a capitalist economy. Our history is fucking amazing. We have freed more people from tyranny and helped more people live a better life than any other country in the history of the world. One day America will get its collective head out of its ass and shitcan these statist, socialist, leftist motherfuckers.

I'm sick of hearing how shitty the U.S. is. This country needs a leader that will stop apologizing for this country. Nobody in the world gives like the U.S. Nobody. Nobody works like America. Nobody creates wealth like America.

I am celebrating Labor Day by create little money makers. I am creating more wealth. It's what Americans do...at least us fuckers that aren't slaves on the American plantation.

Zero. Not One. Nada. Zip. No Jobs Gained in August

The US economy created no jobs and the unemployment rate held steadily higher at 9.1 percent in August, fueling concerns that the US is heading for another recession.

It was the first time since World War II that the economy had a net zero jobs created for a month.

Didn't our dear leader say something about a laser focus on jobs? Didn't our government spend something like a billion dollar to stimulate the economy ostensibly for job creation?

At what point will the Obama Administration get the government out of the way and let the free market economy work?

Their only answer is more government spending and more government meddling. An infrastructure bank. Seriously? How about reform the tax code? How about dump ObamaCare and Dodd-Frank to lessen the burden of regulations on businesses. How about get the damn EPA, HHS and Justice of the backs of Americans and let them get to work and create wealth?

None. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Nein. No jobs created in August. That is pathetic.

It's Bush's fault right?

Three years in and leftists still blame Bush for all their problems. Fair enough. But if that is the case then they are proving that they are not smart enough to figure out a solution. Next! The Obama administration should simply resign.

The worst President ever.